Today we learn about one of Darius' childhood alter egos: Facts Murphy. (We stan.) The people who make JJBA merchandise are leaving *so much money on the table*, they should really hire us to just write "Not another phone strap??" every week to keep them in line. We have to think about how souls work, which is extremely dark and depressing because in the JoJo's universe the overall afterlife vibe is: Not Great. Polnareff is a total idiot. D'Arby is an amazing cat guardian. And Joseph Joestar has probably seduced at least one man by putting coins in a shotglass, that man's game is incredible.