We spend exactly as much time discussing the opening credits as they deserve (which is to say: a lot). Whatever happened to Space Ripper Stingy Eyes, did Dio forget how to shoot laser beams from his eyes at some point? Is Dio Science different from JoJo Science, which is different from Actual Science? Where did Jotaro find those fifty magazines, and are they all Marine Life magazine? (Yes.) How does Polnareff still not remember how vampires work? And if you were a unicorn, dear listener, would your horn manifest as a hat or a heart headband? That’s it, those are the only two options. Decide now.